Yesterday I ran to ballard and back. It was okay. Nothing fancy. Nothing out of the ordinary. No snot running down my cheeks. No farts. No weirdos trying to faux race me. No big deal. On the way back, I stopped in a store in Fremont. Should I name it? Meh, why not? Custom Smoothies and Sports Nutrition. My brother told me about Nuun tablets for hydration and electrolytes. Plop plop fizz fizz now you are a hydrated whiz!! I figured with my taste for anything alcohol flavored, I need all the help I can get in the hydration department. So I went into the store and bought a tube of tablets. The skinny beeotch behind the counter rang up my tablets, looked me up and down, and said "would you like fat burners with that?"
WHAAA?!?!
WHAAA?!?!I couldn't control myself. I flung myself across the counter (superman style), shoved her face in a pile of wheatgrass, gave her a wedgie, and forced her to eat 7 Reeses Peanutbutter cups. Of course, that was all in my head, as I tend to be a lover/sarcastic beeotch rather than a fighter. But still, I wanted to karate chop her. And I could have too, ya know, I took karate for a week one summer. I'm a transparent belt - so fierce you can't even see it.
What I actually did was glare at her and say "nah, I'm good." Didn't she know that since I started running I've shave two whole freakin' minutes off of my mile? AND lost 7 pounds (its probably all poop, but we won't get into that.) That's a big accomplishment and I'm sort of proud of myself. So there stupid skinny beeotch. Take your fat burners and shove them in your mean spirited gullet!
Man...I wonder if one of these days I'm going to have a nice post for y'all to read. They all seem to be pretty negative. Oh well, positivity is for after school specials. I like reality.
Special shout-out: DyLon I love you more and more everyday. Thanks for being my cheerleader (in a manly way, of course). I can't wait to marry you.
