Urban Hike in Ghettosville

It's no secret, I don't like the city I live in, Marysville.  I know what you're saying "why don't you move then, Dumbass?"  Well, Marysville just so happens to be placed smack dab between Seattle (where I work) and Bellingham (where my husband works).  And by the way, it's not nice to call people a dumbass.  Okay?
So yeah, we're pretty much stuck until one of us mandates a move...which may not be as far off as I think it is.  But until we relocate, it's my civic duty to make Marysville bearable.  And how do I make light of any situation?  By humor of course!  Nature's defense mechanism.
This is where my Urban Hike in Ghettosville comes in.  I'm sort of on a health kick, as of late, since my scale screamed last time I got on it and said "oh no you didn't!"  More exercise is necessary, you know, besides moving from couch to couch and Wii Olympics.  So I've been walking a few miles every other day.  On my walks, I would see the oddest oddities this side of the oddest river.  Too bad it took me half a dozen walks and tons of "what the f*ck is that" statements before I took my camera with me.  So come take a journey with me in one of the grossest towns in Washington.  OCDers beware, these pics are certain to trigger your need for hand sanitizer.

Somewhere, there's a naked taco.

An attempt at humor. "Take the espresso lane to work." Har. Har.

This house has a BAZILLION garden statues.  There's a mermaid, an owl, a Venus, an orb. Etc.

 

Somewhere, there's a baby with half a binky and a mother that hasn't noticed.

Um, palm trees in Washington?  Okay...

Yeah, I stroked it. 

A bag of meth.  At a park, nonetheless.

Meth kills bees dead.

Marysvillians take pride in their garage sale signage. 

Somewhere, there's an empty slot machine.

A phonetically correct malt beverage.

Meth makes houses crooked.

Damn thing was empty.

The chaser.

It would have been cool if it was real.

Yep.  It's a steak knife.  Right in front of a school.  Sigh.

So that's what I gathered in a 24 hour period.  Next time, I will bring my video camera.  I get a lot of "woohoos" and "yeehaws" from passerbys.  Typically I'd be flattered if it wasn't yelled from the back of an old Ford truck with a confederate flag waving.

Until next time, Ghettosville.