New Topic - New Look and Feel

I'm breaking up with my running blog. I think it's time. It feels like we've grown apart. I don't know who it is anymore. Thanks Running Blog, you helped me get through some hard times...now pack your shit and get out of my house. Don't forget your toothbrush.


With that being said - I've picked a new topic/theme for my blog. I'm a misstepmom!!! Aka, Stepmom with lack of experience.

Some of you know, some of you don't, DyLon (my soon-to-be husband) has a thirteen year old son. I don't want his name plastered all over the net, so we'll call him "Z". Z is thirteen and I'm twenty nine (I can say that for only 2 more weeks). That makes me only 16 years older than Z. 16! Holy crap. When I was 16 I was doing bad things and hanging with bad people. I can't imagine having a kid then. Cool thing is, now I get a son without having been through labor, stretch marks, leaky boobs, and unbelievable amounts of poop. Bad news is, I have to figure out how to be a good role model. Shit. That means I have to behave myself. For those that know me, know how ridiculously hard that is for me. I can't have verbal diarrhea - which is what I do best.
Sidebar note: if there was an award in high school, like a "most likely to succeed" but instead "most likely to get slapped for her big mouth" I would have won. I would have given a glorious speech. "Thank you douche bags for giving me endless amounts of material. Without your constant influence, I would have nothing to talk about. By the way, did you know that all you popular chicks will get fat and get herpes? Good luck with Valtrex. It's all about suppression."

But I digress. Back onto my trials and tribulations of being a young stepmom. On July 11th, Z will come stay with us (he lives 90% of the time in Montana with his mom) through August 2nd. To help my nerves and to help me express myself, I will openly blog about my experience being a young stepmom.

This must be said and it is without hesitation that I write it: I love Z. He is a great kid with an imagination much like mine (oh god, someone give him an intervention now). I am honored to be DyLon's wife, and even more honored to be Z's stepmom. It isn't everyday someone trusts you to be a positive influence on a youngsters life...

Okay, so I have two weeks to prepare until said Z stays with us. I've actually got great hand eye coordination (I catch my Mom from falling in downtown Seattle all the time) so I should be able to stop milk spills. I've got great comeback skills so I should be able to sass him right back. I know how to cook so I'll be able to feed him properly. The thing that I lack is patience. DyLon is going to have to give me a crash lesson in patience. Let's hope I have the patience to pay attention. Har har har.

So stay tuned America, Brooke's about to become a young stepmom. Prepare yourself for crazy quotes like last year's "my testicle popped out" not to outshine "oh poopsquah!"

Here we go...